Before we start. You will need one candlestick with holder, three pieces of paper to write on,a pencil or pen, and some matches to light the candle. Now find a spot in your house or wherever you feel most comfortable to sit. With no disturbance from anybody or anything for the next thirty minutes to one hour max . Lets start by taking a deep breath and hold it for five seconds and let it out telling yourself "I am Ready".

Grab the pen and paper and lets begin: First your visual background check( e.g.) go back in time mentally as far back as you can remember between the ages of 7-16.  Now this is Very Very Important  (your results from this exercise Depends solely on this main step).

1.Jot down any comments or actions towards you(good and bad) I emphasize again (GOOD & BAD)actions or  comments on one piece of paper starting with the ones that effected your ways of thinking towards a person or persons in a negative way , calling you a bad name(comments or their actions that made you mad) Starting with your family, and siblings, Your friends, your boss, co-workers, a stranger on the street, on the bus,  your kids or at work, in your car while driving etc...... (just jot down a word or a short phrase that caused you to remember and relate to a particular experience Good or Bad (For example) the name of a car, or  a color, the persons name and so on....now back to the present moment( you do not need to write down the whole story regarding each situation it was already in your memory bank ) 

2. Now Sort out the list in two separate sheets of paper and divide them in two categories  mark A. ( made you feel good actions and comments) and B.(made you feel bad comments and actions)

3.  Take a deep breath, hold it for five seconds and let out. Repeat  two more times.

4. Close your eyes and try to focus on the A list. (if you follow the step right your mind will always form why questions regarding the unpleasant comments) on the B list .e.g Why would they say ### things about me? Now Light   the candle and focus on the flame part for about five minute max.

5. Grab the B list and burn it using the candle while saying to yourself (In a soft tone of voice )" I am a good Person" say it until the whole list burns to ashes ("very important") (Be careful not to burn your fingers).  Focus on the A list and repeat step 3 one more time and your done.